jagged little pill

Manila, 8 November—Among my earliest memories as a child coming of age is riding shotgun in the morning with my mother on the way to school, turning the radio on and tuning into an FM station.

This was a Big Deal, because morning drives were often reserved for the same old boring AM station and the morning news on the radio. This was almost non-negotiable; I learned early on how important the news were, especially traffic updates (at the time almost nonexistent; my mother drove us to school on the way to work, Cavite to Alabang, in 20 to 30 minutes. School day morning rush hour! I doubt you can cross the length of SM Southmall in under 30 minutes these days) and the occasional weather updates, particularly whenever it rained. So I almost never messed with the radio.

On occasion, however, my mother let me choose what to listen to during our morning drives, and so I’d tune in on whatever station my classmates were talking about (at the time, people sorted themselves into 89.9 Magic people and 93.1 RX people, for some reason).

Long story short, that was how I met Alanis Morissette. I remember listening to Hand in My Pocket and having to turn the volume down whenever she sang chickenshit because god forbid my mother find out that I was into songs by angry women who liked to curse on the radio HAHA

Whenever I hear Alanis songs these days, it always brings me back to those car rides, being much younger, and being only half-heartedly into the boy bands that were also beginning to get pretty popular at the time (HAHA raging gay child is gay).

I still get this distinct ding in my chest whenever I hear Head Over Feet out of the blue—love at first hear? Is there such a thing? And of course, singing along to Ironic and You Oughta Know (IT’S NOT FAaaAIR TO DENY MEEeeeEEE) at the top of my lungs.

Man, do you remember how shocked we were by pixelated naked!Alanis on MTV when Thank U came out? Do you remember how relatable That I Would Be Good and Perfect were, at least for overachieving girls? And man, do you remember how glorious those MTV Unplugged sessions were!!! Sigh.

And then there was Feast On Scraps. Because Simple Together.

Grabe yung AOL Music Sessions guys!

And Hands Clean, of course.

Oh wow, these two tracks in particular truly bring me back a decade and a half in terms of heartache haha. ANYWAY. I’m talking about Alanis because earlier this week, I got wind of a Broadway musical inspired by Jagged Little Pill.

The song featured was You Learn, and for the first time, I heard it—watched it—interpreted by an ensemble. And it was beautiful. I realized it’s such a great song to do in multiple voices, because we all learn differently. And if there’s a song that truly aged well, it’s this.

You live you learn, you love you learn
You cry you learn, you lose you learn
You bleed you learn, you scream you learn

You grieve you learn, you choke you learn
You laugh you learn, you choose you learn
You pray you learn, you ask you learn
You live you learn

That mashup to Thank U at the end killed me

Thank you India
Thank you providence
Thank you disillusionment
Thank you frailty
Thank you consequence
Thank you thank you silence

*a tear fell*

Thank you, indeed.

Happy weekend,